Breakups are always a difficult thing - many people feel negative emotions regarding the subject, as even if they don't feel well in a relationship, they don't want to end up being the bad person. However, some breakups are necessary (especially in abusive relationships), which is why you should be a mature enough person that you can quit a relationship, without letting other people or emotions cloud your judgment. This article is going to explain the 5 most important things to avoid during a breakup.
Don't Forget the Practical Things
In case your ex has any of your passwords (email, Facebook or for any other website), keys or other possessions, you should definitely think about this before breaking up. For example, what are you going to do in case your ex decides not to talk to you after the breakup? How are you going to recover your house keys, because if you don't this, you'll never feel as safe as home as you should (unless you change the lock).
Another thing to keep in mind is to not punish your ex. When you do the breakup talk (whether that is in person or not), you should try to not make things difficult for them. A helpful thing in situations like this is to try to make you feel better about what is happening. Perhaps you can tell him or her that you can continue to have conversations as friends, and that you don't have to stop talking after the breakup.
Don't Do Pauses
One of the worst things people do when they break up is to take pauses instead of completely breaking up, or perhaps not breaking up at all. "Pausing" your relationship is the worst of both worlds - you are both sacrificing and risking the stability and trust in your relationship, and you may end up giving false hope to your partner. Imagine this - if you two get back together, there will always be some type of bad feeling left behind or perhaps the trust between you won't be the same due to the things that may happen during the break.
You should also remember that you don't have to justify your feelings to your ex. You are entitled to your own feelings, and if you think and or know that the relationship is not right for you, you shouldn't feel ashamed or bad about it. Everyone grows up while being in a relationship, and it is completely normal to outlast your current relationship.
You Don't Have to Worry About Mutual Friends
A lot of people worry about what happens to your mutual friends - who gets to keep them, and who losses their mutual friends? Well, according to leading experts in the dating field, friends shouldn't be a factor in breakups - because breaking up is primarily done to help you out, meaning if some friends decide not to keep being in touch with you, that shouldn't affect your decision whether to break up or not.
Just imagine how unfulfilling life would be if you stay in a dead-end relationship, just because you are worried about losing mutual friends. While making new friends is difficult as you age, the process is never going to become impossible - you can always join a local group, gym, class or non-profit organization and make new like-minded friends. All it takes is willpower, discipline and being (slightly) talkative.
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